Four kids, chosen at random to save the world from another race plagued by bad music, spend their spare time reading other people's stuff. Go figure. ROLL CALL! KIYAKUMA MAKIKO: "Yeah, whaddaya want this time?" KUJIGOKU SHIN: "All right, we're on again!" TAKESHI UKYOU: "As long as they don't say I'm a girl, it's okay..." SAKAMOTO HANAKO: "Keep it down, Ukyou-chan." >From: J Chu >To: ffml@fanfic.com >Subject: [FFML][FIC][YUA] Miyuki...==> Car Chase Chaos >Date: Thu, 25 Mar 1999 01:22:21 -0500 > >Okay. This is Mk 4 of this fic. I changed a couple of elusive >errors, and changed the title. I think this might be the final >version. SHIN: Thank GOD! That last one absolutely SUCKED! *WHAP* HANAKO: [leans back in her chair] > >C&C is still requested. I'd like to know what I did right, and what >I did wrong. > >Many thanks to Miko, David Siegel, Chan Wei Lik, Mr. Biles, Allyn >Younge, Ace Ban Dage and Tyree for their help and suggestions. A big >thank you to Thomas Peng, your Taiho Sichauzo and the Modern Japanese >Police site kicks much ass. I am also indebted to the Koto-ka >Cultural Reference Center for the map and information on Koto City >(the actual area of Tokyo depicted in the OAV and TV series), Chiba- >Prefecture PR folks (for more general police info), and to the Tokyo >International Exposition Center folks who helped with other maps. >Hopefully, more of this info will show up in later fics (if I ever >get enough free time). > UKYOU: Neat-o! MAKIKO: Isn't that useless since Bokuto's an imaginary ward? SHIN: Maybe. >The characters from You're Under Arrest in this fiction are the >creations of Kosuke Fujishima. > >--- >Car Chase Chaos SHIN: Sounds like a 70's song. UKYOU: Mm-hmm. > >By JC MAKIKO: JC? Ever heard of him? SHIN: I think he's a newbie. HANAKO: Doesn't he run a chain of American department stores? UKYOU: That's JC *PENNEY,* dear. HANAKO: Oh. > >My fanfic page is at http://165.230.139.14/fic/ UKOYU: No domain? >--- > >A small group of schoolchildren clustered around Nakajima, as he sat >down and cried with some of them. > >"Don't cry Mr. Kenny!" UKYOU: o/~ Don't cry for me, Mr. Kenny--o/~ *WHAP* HANAKO: That's enough out of you, dear. > >"Miyuki's gonna be all better. You'll see." > >"Do you want my hanky?" > >*sniff* "Wahhhh! Miyuki got a big boo boo!" > >"Natsumi is being scary again." > >"Why didn't you go with Miyuki to the hospital, Mr. Kenny?" > >The ambulance pulled away from the curb, splashing the area with its >flashing lights. Miyuki's precious mini patrol car sat beside the >curb, the hatchback open and its mangled right door lying several >meters down the road. HANAKO: Ick. SHIN: Cool. *WHAP* SHIN: Itai... > >"I'm pathetic," whimpered Nakajima. "I was too busy showing off. I >should have seen... it. I could have stopped it. I..." > >The White Hawk of Bokuto broke down even further. UKYOU: Oy. Feel sorry for him. HANAKO: What happened to Ken? SHIN: Normal stuff for him. Shows off, endagers his girlfriend's life, the typical stuff. HANAKO: Wait...have you ever SEEN You're Under Arrest? SHIN:... > >The kids gathered around and hugged him as several more patrol cars >pulled up. > >--- > >A figure on a moto-compo buzzed up and over a hill as it attempted to >cut off a speeding Honda. > >"This is Natsumi! Where the hell is my backup!" MAKIKO: That should be "...is my backup?" or "...is my backup??!?!" Otherwise it sounds like a command. > >Yuriko squealed in an apologetic voice, "I'm sorry! Most of the >patrols are tied up at the Imperial Expressway jam. There's just too >much traffic!" UKYOU: "It's those Nerima kids again! Damn martial artists, getting in the way of cars..." > >The tires on the mini bike gave off little chirping sounds, valiantly >gripping the sidewalk as Natsumi made a tight turn around a corner. > >"Can't you get anyone out here? I'm gonna lose him!" > >"The captain is on the way with helo support. Hold on Natsumi!" > >Suddenly the road stopped curving. Natsumi went flying down another >hill as she caught a glimpse of the offending Honda. > >"Grrrr... I want blood you little bastard! No one runs over my >partner and gets away with it!" UKYOU: Grrrratuitous. HANAKO: It'd be better if it were phrased something like, "Miyuki growled. 'I WANT BLOOD, YOU LITTLE BASTARD!" UKYOU: Um, not so loud, Hana-chan. You're scaring me. > >The road ahead of the car started to open up a bit. Natsumi felt her >chest tightening. UKYOU: I wanna SEE her chest tighten! Wooh-- *WHAP* HANAKO: Enough of that, Ukyou-chan. > >*Oh no. Once he gets on the open roads, I'll lose him!* > >Fortunately, a truck started to pull out ahead of the Honda. > >*Screeeeeeech* > >The Honda made a 180 degree brake turn and skidded to a halt, close >to the side of the truck. > >"Hah hah! I've got you now, you little punk!" > >Natsumi's shout of joy quickly dissolved into a confused screech, as >the car accelerated toward her. > >"Oh crap! Ahhhhhhh!" SHIN: "Oh crap?" UKYOU: Obviously somebody's been reading their FFML posts... > >Natsumi swerved her minibike over to the side of the still cramped >street. The back bumper of the car scraped Natsumi's arm back. > >She was peeled off the bike almost instantaneously. Natsumi >instinctively tried to roll with the fall, but it only dampened the >impact slightly. > >"Arrrrrrrrrgh... Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch! Dammit!" > >The minibike slid down the road, spinning slightly as bits and pieces >broke off. It flipped over in a cartwheel as it hit the curb and >landed on a shrub. > >Natsumi raised her head slowly and looked down the road. MAKIKO: Euh... > >*Dammit. You are going to pay dearly for that. I, Natsumi, will see >to it.* UKYOU: You will pay dearly for that. SHIN: I will see to it. BOTH: For I, Tsujimoto Natsumi am...THE BLUE THUNDER OF BOKUTO STATION! BWAHAHAHAHA-- *WHAP* *WHAP* BOTH: Itai... GIRLS: Jerks. > >The sounds of a helo buzzed in intensity. Suddenly, the police >command helo blazed overhead in pursuit of the criminal. > >Natsumi managed to cheer a bit from her hoarse throat. > >"You go, Captain! Kick his sorry ass." > >--- > >"This is PC-109, over! We are monitoring the progress of a black >Honda >Civic Type R over the main highway. Please respond, >dispatch!" > >"We have intercept! Exits from your position on have been blocked. >A ram and slam team is on it's way."(1) UKYOU: Ooh, footnote. > >"I see it. Give me a direct frequency to them." > >"Yessir." > >"This is the Captain speaking. Units 11 and 7 are blocking off the >next two exits. The exit near the Kiba station is the barricade >site." > >--- > >The little procession of cars approached the roadblock. > >The ram and slam team was still shadowing the car, keeping their >distance. > >"This is PC-107. Let's box this sucker." > >"Got it." > >The two police cars riding parallel to the black Honda started to >squeeze inwards. The Honda stomped on its brakes and swerved to the >left a little, nudging the rear of the leftmost police car. > >"What the..." > >Suddenly the Honda shoved the car forward and to the left. The car >quickly skidded and slammed into the leading police car. The leading >car hit its brakes, out of reflex, and skidded some more. The police >car on the right swerved to the right in an effort to avoid the lead >car, but ended up smashing into the highway divider and spinning >around, crashing into the two other cars. SHIN: ...causing a giant pileup of 72 cars all crashing into each other in a six-minute montage. HANAKO: You've been watching "Blues Brothers 2000" again, haven't you? SHIN: Is it _that_ obvious? > >The black Honda accelerated around the mess. The tinted passenger >window lowered slightly. > >"Clear the roadblock! Clea..." SHIN: Ooh, I like that. > >Officers leapt out of the way as the car tore through the stop >barriers. > >Several of the officers whipped out their revolvers and attempted to >shoot the tires out, but missed. UKYOU: Also known as the Stormtrooper effect. > >The black car made a radical s-turn as it avoided the nail strips >beyond the barrier. > >A cigarette butt dropped to the pavement as the car departed. HANAKO: I don't get it. Ukyou-chan, what's with the cigarette butt? UKYOU: I think the bad guys dropped it on their way out. HANAKO: Maybe JC should have made it clearer? MAKIKO: Maybe. SHIN: Hey...what happened to the RPG? MAKIKO: It turned into a cigarette butt. > >--- > >"WHAT?!!!?" > >Yuriko blanched as Natusmi fumed and cursed, "We... lost the car. It >punched a hole in our roadblock." > >"Grrrrrr. Ouch! You gotta be more careful with that bandage..." UKYOU: I still think those "Grrrrrr's" are gratuitous. > >Yuriko withdrew the gauze and placed it more gently on a scrape >across Natsumi's face. > >The Captain came up behind the two ladies. > >"How are you ladies holding up?" > >Natsumi gave the Captain the gaze of death. UKYOU: That should be "the Gaze of Death." It's the generic glare that people give others to state the obvious. HANAKO: [gives Ukyou the Gaze of Death] UKYOU: Okay, I'll shut up now. > >"You didn't catch him." > >*sigh* The Captain was having a long day. > >"No. Our barricade failed. I came to inform you that I am going to >the hospital to go see officer Kobayakawa. Do you wish to come >along?" > >Natsumi looked down at the ground. > >"I failed her. I should have seen that car. I can't face her right >now. I'm her partner! I was supposed to watch her back!" > >"No. You did not 'fail' her. The criminal seems intent on harming >someone. From Nakajima's account, you attempted to shield the >children. Kobayakawa understands what the priorities are in that >kind of situation." > >"There had to be some way to protect the kids and save her too!" > >The Captain put his hands on her shoulder. > >"You did the best that you could in that situation. There really >isn't much more to discuss. Shall we go see Kobayakawa?" MAKIKO: And no comments on what Nakajima did? HANAKO: They wouldn't, Kiku-chan. He probably messed up somewhere along the line. MAKIKO: Hm. > >--- > >The Captain and Natsumi rode the hospital elevator in relative >silence. The only sound was the crackling of the fluorescent light. > >"Where is Kenny? I thought..." UKYOU: Ohmygawd! They killed Kenny! The bastards! > >"He went ahead of us. He was quite... insistent." > >"Ooooooh. Are you as... insistent, Captain?" > >A very faint blush spread across the Captain's face as he stiffened >up and stared at the elevator door. > >"Ah... I don't know what you are talking about, Officer Tsujimoto." > >*ding* > >The doors opened, much to the Captain's relief. > UKYOU: Heheheheh. >--- > >Miyuki brightened a bit when Natsumi entered the room. > >"Hi Natsumi! I'm not looking that good am I." MAKIKO: That sould be "I'm not looking that good, am I?" SHIN: That time of the month again? *WHAP* *WHAP* > >Natsumi drawled in a light voice, "Actually it's not too bad, Miyuki. >You just got a mild concussion and a few contusions. No broken bones >or anything like that. Now you know how I felt like when I fell off >my bike." > >"Oh thanks, Natsumi. That makes me feel soooo much better. You look >like you were kinda scraped up." > >"It's just a scratch. Heh. Looks like Nakajima is a bit bushed." UKYOU: Maybe he was busy playing "doctor" with Mi-- *WHAP* > >Nakajima Ken was dozing off on a chair in the corner. A little >trickle of drool dripped out of the corner of his mouth onto his >shirt. A tall glass with a few roses was on the table by his chair. MAKIKO: Just like someone else in class, eh, Takeshi? UKYOU: Shaddap. > >"Shhh... He's real tired. He came running in here earlier with the >roses and some tea. He was so nervous, I thought he was going to >spill the tea all over." > GIRLS: [Starry-eyed look] Awww... UKYOU: [sweatdrop] >"Awwww. Kenny brought you roses? He is a softie at heart after >all." > >"Hey! Don't call him Kenny..." > >The Captain walked in with a sheaf of papers. > >"So, Nakajima's asleep on the job, eh?" > >Nakajima woke up with a start. > >"Um. Ah. Captain!" > >"I forgive you this time. Your new order is to keep company with >Miss Kobayakowa from tonight until her release from the hospital in a >few days. You are to cater to her every need. Do you understand?" > >"Yes sir!" > UKYOU: "Like playing 'doc--'" *WHAP* HANAKO: Enough out of you, Ukyou-chan. >"Here is a list of things you need to pick up." > UKYOU: Some...personal things. *WHAP* UKYOU: Itai. >The Captain dropped the sheaf of paper into Nakajima's outstretched >hands. > >Yoriko chose this moment to enter the hospital room. > >"Hiya Miyuki! Hiya Captain! Hiya Natsumi! Hiya Ken!" ALL: "Hiya Mannyyyyy!" > >"Hi Yuriko!" ALL: YURIKO-CHAN! > >"I believe I will leave you ladies, and Nakajima alone for a while. >I have some work to attend to." > >The Captain strode out of the room. > >"Oooooh Kenny! You have to cater to her 'every need', huh? So >whatcha gonna make him do, Miyuki? Huh huh? Whatcha gonna do?" UKYOU: Play-- *WHAP* SHIN: That's a much-improved response rate, Hanako-chan. > >Nakajima shriveled a bit in his seat as the three women gave him a >look strangely akin to that of a lion before it dives into a herd of >gazelle. > >"Hmmm... I don't know... what do you two think?" > >The three women looked at each other and laughed. > >Nakajima slouched down even further, a massive sweatdrop forming on >his brow. > >*I'm dead, aren't I?* > >--- > >Natsumi and Ken walked out of the elevator into the hospital's >garage. > >"So, whatcha got on the list, Ken?" > >"Ah. I have to get some items for Miyuki." *WHAP* UKYOU: I didn't say anything, Hana-chan! HANAKO: But you were going to. UKYOU: ... > >"Doesn't that require getting into our apartment?" > >"Oh. I suppose so. You need a ride home, right?" > >"Sure. By the way, what did Miyuki tell you anyhow?" > >Nakajima reddened a bit. > >"Ah. She had a personal request to make... I really can't tell you >too much." UKYOU: [ducks] > >"Hmmm. I'll have to get it out of Miyuki later..." > >--- > >As the two officers drove out of the garage, a black Honda sped >across the intersection. > >"Ken! The Honda! It's him!" > >"Bokuto Station, this is Nakajima. I have spotted a black Honda >Civic with racing modifications. It matches the vehicle from earlier >today. I am with officer Tsujimoto. Permission to pursue?" > >"Roger. This is Bokuto Command. Permission to pursue is granted. >Back up has been notified." > >"You up to a little chase, Natsumi?" > >"You betcha! Let's ride!" > >The Honda quickly dodged down into a narrow side road. > >Houses and fences whipped by as the bike gained on the car. > >The Honda swayed back and forth in an attempt to block the bike. > >The road opened up more as it joined up with another street. > >The bike accelerated alongside the car. Nakajima booted the door a >couple of times, while the car tried to smash Natsumi and him into >the passing buildings. > >"Whoo hoo! Geronimo!" > >Natsumi leaped onto the car and proceeded to pry the sunroof off. >She ducked her head inside. > >"Hiya, Mr. Criminal! Welcome on board the Natsumi Express! It's a >one way ride to jail! Have a very nice day." MAKIKO: "Please make sure all your seats are in their upright position and your trays locked into the seat in front of you. We will be experiencing turbulence in a short moment..." > >She then climbed over the hood and stuck her legs out in front of the >car, using her shoes to brake on the pavement. The car swerved, >tossing Natsumi to the side and then plowed into a stone wall on the >side. The back trunk of the car popped open and some fuel started to >leak. > >Nakajima stopped his cycle to check on Natsumi. > >"I'm all right! Go get that guy, Kenny!" MAKIKO: YEAH! > >The man ducked out of the car, dropping a burning cigarette. He >grabbed a mini cycle out of the trunk and gave it a running start. >The car burst into flame behind him, barring Nakajima's way for a few >precious seconds. SHIN: YEAH! > >"Crap! You aren't getting away this time." > >As the man buzzed away on his cycle, a familiar red car pulled out in >front of him from a nearby alley. The little bike smacked into the >hood of the car and did an endo that flung the man into a nearby >trash heap. The little ERA Mini quickly went into reverse, back into >the alley. > >Natsumi and Nakajima came up to the trash heap. Natsumi glanced into >the side alley but wasn't able to see any signs of the ERA Mini. > >Nakajima leaned over the barely conscious figure. > >"How did you like being hit by a car, hmm? It's not so great when >it's the other way around is it? Heh heh. You know, I'm going to >throw the book at you and thoroughly enjoy it. Let's tally off the >various laws you've broken..." > >A fire engine and another couple of patrol cars arrived with a wail >of sirens. > HANAKO: And they all lived happily ever after. >--- > >A week later. MAKIKO: I think it would've been better in brackets. You know, [one week later] or something like that. > >"So, you are feeling better now. Good! Have a little more tea, >dear." > >Miyuki and Natsumi were having lunch at the local temple. UKYOU: "Thanks, Bell-chan!" > >"Mmmm. You sure know how to make a girl feel better, Osho." > >"Oh, thank you Natsumi. It's just some tea." > >"Well, thank you for inviting us for lunch, sir." > >"I should thank you two for coming, Miyuki." > >"Well, we have to get back to the station. Duty calls." > >"Bye ladies! Good luck at work!" > >The two ladies walked back to the patrol car. > >"What did you say to Kenny?" > >"I'm not telling." > >"Fine, fine. I'll just let Yuriko know..." > >"You wouldn't dare! Natsuuuumiiiii!" > UKYOU: I hate it when local gossip gets around. HANAKO: And why is that, Ukyou-chan? UKYOU: ...[sweatdrops] >--- > >Osho brought the tea tray back inside the temple. > >He then went to the back of the temple and picked up a rubber mallet >and a block of wood. > >He kneeled down and petted the little cat that was rubbing against >his leg. > >"Ah. They do come through these trials of life quite well don't >they." > >*whack* *whack* *thump* *thump* > >Osho wiped his brow, and then resumed pounding out a large dent in >the side fender of his mini. UKYOU: "What're those?" SHIN: "Speed dents. Makes the car go faster." UKYOU: "Oh." > >"You, on the other hand, seem to have gotten the worst of this >adventure. I suppose it's a small price to pay for the safety of the >people." > >***** > >(1) "Ram and slam" is a method in which police play bumper cars with SHIN: Rather abrupt ending, isn't it? MAKIKO: I don't think it's a good idea to end on a non-associated quote. I'd cut it out if I were you. >a speeding car. They box the car in on at least three sides (the >front and two sides and the back if possible). They then brake in >unison. > > UKYOU: Only one footnote? What's the point of numbering them, then? HANAKO: Consistency. UKYOU: There can't be consistency when it's just one footnote! > >03/25/99 >-- >James Chu >Primary Animator for EVA-R >www.eva-r.com >To contact: write to chubacca@clam.rutgers.edu or dance the jig while >waving mackerel around your head, yodel the theme to Cheers in front of >a >local McDonalds, or storm the local barbershop and use all the hair >clippings to create a tent ... > >"And I'll wear my yellow bunny undies" - C-Ko *WHAP* UKYOU: Itai... > >"Stupid, STUPID, rat creatures..." - Bone > > MAKIKO: Show's over, guys! Whaddaya think? SHIN: Could be better. Action scenes a bit drawn out. UKYOU: I thought it was good! Except for the ending. HANAKO: Timing's off, but plot was okay. One more revision oughta cut it. MAKIKO: Well, that's it for now, I guess...see you later!